yikes....

I suck as a blogger. I was abducted by aliens. Honest. They sent me back too. Said something like "asks too many questions..." something. Pansies. Request one simple anal probe....

Let's get to it. I'm pregnant. June 6th, transferred two lovely embryos. Apparently one (or more?) stuck around. Must have been that sticky fella that didn't want to come out of the tube. I worried though. To be totally honest, I think I still don't believe it. Our last surrogacy I got my first positive home pregnancy test (HPT) seven days after the transfer. This time, the seventh day passed with nary a line. I immediately wrote the whole thing off and started wondering when the next transfer would be. Yeah, I'm an optimist.

So I managed to convince myself that this time was going to be different anyway, and expecting the exact same thing was foolish. That was before getting another negative eight days after the transfer. That pretty much sealed the deal for me. Yet I kept thinking WAY back in the back of my mind, it could still work out. But, seriously, I man WAY BACK in the very back of my mind. Areas rarely used for thought. Cobwebs and whatnot.

Monday rolls around and it's the day we're leaving for the beach. Even though I had given up, I still had a billion dollars worth of HPT's in the cupboard. I did what you do on them and set it aside while I tried to look elsewhere. I checked the results prior to the full three minutes and had to do a double take. Now, the previous tests were all torn apart for proper analyzation. This one didn't need prying open. There was the faintest of faint lines, but it was there. I promptly stuck the test in a baggie and tucked it safely into my purse and commenced with beach packing.

During the two and half hour drive to the beach, I checked the HPT roughly eleven times. That line was there without any special vision enhancement necessary. Very exciting. However, being me... I wasn't convinced. I mean, this was two days later than last time. I proceeded to go through an extensive amount of HPT's during vacation. All the test result lines continued to darken in progression, leading one to assume the levels of HCG in my system were increasing properly. Still not convinced.

Finally the time came for the blood test. And yes, I tested on HPT's all the way up until test day. Mind you, the tests have all gotten as dark as they could... but I wasn't going to quit. "Pee Away" they begged me. So this past Monday morning, I woke up at 5:30am got ready then headed out for the clinic at 6am. It's not as bad as it sounds. Anyway, bloodwork done, home by 7:30am. I was home before anyone even woke up.

The nurse called me at 1:30pm with my Beta number, which was 226. I then proceeded to sulk since I was expecting a larger number, because once again, I was comparing this to the last time. I posted my number on my various surrogacy forums and everyone else seemed to think it was a fine number. I then started researching other peoples numbers and started feeling better about the number. In fact, there was a surrogate that had similar numbers and was carrying twins. GAH. We'll worry about that later.

Fast forward to Wednesday, another early appointment, blood test, nurse called at 1:30 again. What we're looking for is the number doubling. So in order for me to relax, the number had to be at least 452. Well it was 587. So the doubling time was less than 48 hours, which is good. Very good.

I'm now willing to call myself pregnant but I'm reserved about it. We have our ultrasound next week so we'll see how things are going for sure then.